A nude Angelina Jolie?

Okay, so Rob Pattison didn't draw the traffic I assumed.  Maybe that is because I was appealing to a group, women, who don't puriently surf the web as much as I guys do.  So this time I will try a woman of appeal. 

For my newer minions an explanation, I was curious if putting the name of a famous person here would increase traffic.  My hypothesis was built on the premise that no one I personally know is aware I am writing, and thus, strangers are coming to this page--purposefully or not. If that is the case, then the likelihood of someone purposefully visiting this page would increase with certain keywords (famous people).

Stay tuned.

Rob Pattison Drives Traffic Here

It is 5:35 am and I have been up for four hours writing a speech I am not particularly proud of.  Oh, I know what you are thinking. "Hey Writer-Boy, you just ended that sentence with a preposition.  Gotcha!"

Yeah...umm...whatever.  Everyone knows that is pedantic nonsense up with which I shall not put. (Thanks, Churchill).

I really have nothing to say or write, but just wanted to check in.  It is kind of fun to do this with nary a friend knowing I am blogging again.  I assume I will eventually be found out, but until then, let's make fun of my douchebag friends.  Okay, you go first.

Lastly, what's up with the title?  I just want to see if putting a celebrity's name increases web traffic.  Given I have NO followers, anyone who comes here does so by random chance or is looking for someone else.  Results to follow.

Whatcha looking for?

So I like these new blogger stats (okay, so they may not be new, but like I said in earlier posts, I haven't been here for a while). In case you were wondering, here are the top search terms used that drove folks to this site.  I wonder if that kid looking for a degree in Zeus fround this site helpful.  I sure hope so.

Thurman munson
thurman munson autopsy photo
thurman munson's brother
"ba in Greek mythology"
"Do you like beer and nachos?"
"guys who have never had girlfrineds"
Artie Lange Munson
artie lange republican
artielange

Fellow bloggers, what are your top search terms?

Shut up and read

I just stopped by to marvel at my own blog. I guess it is sort of like taping myself masturbating. It seemed like a good idea, it felt good when I did it, but now, in retrospect, I am both ashamed and disgusted in myself. What kind of freak am I?

If you are reading this it means you are either a Yankee fan or Howard Stern devotee who has no idea how to use Google. Your stupidity is my gain I suppose. But really, who, if anyone, benefits from this blog? Pen pal-less prisoners?

Most of the folks who blogged with me back in the day have disappeared (or at least won't return my calls). I miss this format. It allows me to write more, be honest more, and take risks. I am on Facebook, for sure, but I am beginning to really sour on the need to edit myself, deal with argumentative people, and read your post about missing Grampy who died 11-years ago and had such a profound impact on your pitiful life. That said, I love an audience and I am too lazy and inconsistent to build one here. I love to write for writings sake, but when it comes right down to it, I am an extrovert and need those personal relationships. Love me, please.

We moved recently and one of our new neighbors, who I have yet to formally meet, told my seven year old son who came to her house trick-or-treating that he and my other kids need to learn to be quiet. I found this out a few days afterwards when my son matter-of-factly shared with me the story.

What the fuck, old lady? You have a problem with my kids, come to me or the Mrs. I suppose if we were established neighbors/friends and you wished to correct my child's behavior, I would be okay. I mean, I am not one of those parents who thinks my kids can do no wrong. That said, I am not sure what they have done wrong. Do they play out front and play chase and laugh and even scream (during daytime hours)? Likely. Do I think they are exceeding 100 decibels, shitting on her lawn, or swearing or dry humping a girl/boyfriend in their view. Not likely.

What should I do about this old crank? I feel like I should approach her and introduce myself. Tell her that I understand she has a problem with my kids and that if she feels she is being inconvenienced, she should come to me or Mrs. Lange. This way, I put her on the spot and secondly, I can then judge if she has a case or not. Who knows, maybe my kids really are true sumbitches. But instead of getting totally defensive, I feel like I should be the judge before I should be the enforcer. We love the neighborhood, but if I have to explain to my kids the idea that there are old kooks in the world and they should be laughed at and ignored, I will. It is not generally my way, (nor is filming myself whacking it, BTW), but sometimes you have to adapt to the circumstances. I would like my kids to always be respectful, but I also want them to learn how to exercise good judgement. Some folks may not deserve our respect.

Thanks for stopping by.

Artie