10. Douche ads and spas use the same design elements. Be careful you don't get them mixed up.
9. My kids are absolutely loco. Christmas has them so jacked-up, so out of control. As I see it, I have lost the ability to parent them from Thanksgiving to Christmas.
8. People who say put the Christ back in Christmas don't know what they are talking about. Sure we get an occasional Xmas out of someone, but do we really think there is some type of conspiracy against the 224,457,000 Christians in America? Given they make up more than 3/4 of the population, do they really feel that oppressed?
7. Tea is for pussies and people with a cold (like Artie).
6. I am stressed about finances and job security, but other people are stressed because they are hungry and don't know where their, or their child's, next meal will come from. Think about supporting your local food bank. Even $10 a month for a year will go a long way. Remember, folks are hungry all year round.
5. Is registering popular CB handles. When the Internet dies and CB's make a comeback, I will be all set to make a killing.
4. Will reduce my carbon footprint by wearing smaller charcoal-based shoes.
3. Babe Ruth was #3. He was fat, liked booze, and chased women. Maybe there is hope for me after all.
2. Had seven channels growing up; 13 if the rotor to our rooftop antenna was in order. I always found something to watch.
1. Vacuum is the only word I know with a double "U". I know a lot of words with double other vowels: Hawaiian aardvarks oogle beer; skiing baboons seek bazaars.
2 comments:
I'm afraid oogle isn't a word. You should have used bookkeeper. It's the only word in the English language that has double letters three times in a row. Wow!
Damn it! Johnson's right! Ogle, no oogle. Not in the Queen's English anyhow. But then again, she's not on my currency, so why must I adhere to her standards, the old coot?
I really enjoy your blog. Please send my regards to the sassy katrocket!
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